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Chronic Illness & Romantic Relationships

It has occured to me before that I am not the only one dealing with Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy (RSD). It has also occured to me that my husband is not the first to be the "well spouse" in dealing with this illness either. I guess that it didn't occur to me that there is a ridiculously high divorce rate, of 75%, attached to this wonderful illness we call RSD. Now of course we can't all buy into statistics or who would actually get married right? With the 50% or higher chance of failing.....Yet, somehow 75% sounds a lot scarier. Maybe it's that 50/50 gives us a fair shot either way. Now there is nothing fair about RSD......there just isn't. Well, I guess nothing that I have found as of yet. So it concerns me that after all of my losses, the biggest thing that I could lose is still on the table. My wonderful husband and our marriage. He breaks his back everyday so that we can live where we live, drive what we drive and pay for all RSD expenses and that is pretty much it. I really do not know how he does it. I think sometimes it is hard to see his point of view. No one would want to be him that is for sure. I feel that my judgement gets clouded with envy though as I soooo wish that I was the well spouse and figure that no matter what I had to do it would all be worth it. What does he do it for though? Obviously love. Still, I never wanted him to have to do this. I asked him before the wedding that if he wanted out then that was fine.....He got mad at me. I know that he loves me and I am so lucky that he would do all these things for me, but I still feel it is not fair to him. He could meet a new girl tomorrow, run off and marry her and start the family that we always wanted. Yet somehow he stays.
I read that chronic pain makes people face up to 34 of the Major Stressors that one can face in life. No wonder things are so rocky and crazy. That makes complete sense. I just wonder how long we can live life this way. This is a great resource for people dealing with a chronic pain illness.

http://www.hup.harvard.edu/features/health/pain_couples.pdf

This next article should also help.

http://www.rd.com/living-healthy/how-to-survive-a-health-crisis-or-chronic-illness-in-marriage/article31897.html

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